Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That we figure out how to schedule all the activities in our lives...again!
  
• That the kids would continue to find joy and peace as the future unfolds with or without us
  
• That we are able to continue to find joy in the moment as we prepare for the future
  
• That our lives would be a blessing to those serve and work with in business and service
  

Had dinner with some old friends this weekend! They were in a small group of our's about eight or nine years ago, then moved to Alaska. Now they're living in the boondocks of Montana, and he's serving as a pastor for a very rural community church. They love it there...small community feel where everyone knows everyone and there's plenty of room for their kids to enjoy the wide open space with freedom and safety.

One of the fascinating things that crossed our conversation was our pastor friend's observations regarding his questionable security within the position he holds. He noted that it is a struggle to accept that his ability to retain his family's livelihood, home, and income as the breadwinner depends solely on whether the elders and congregation continue to like him. He gave me the impression as if each week he's wondering if he's pushing his constituents too hard with his messages. That's a whole lot of pressure I certainly wouldn't want to live under. Though it seems that is a somewhat normal aspect of every job, having that kind of relational dependency while attempting to maintain a level of spiritual integrity is tough.

It's been a long time since I felt that way, of course. When I was serving as an associate pastor, there were elements of that need to be liked that made the job difficult at times. Most of this was an internal struggle...a struggle that probably wasn't even real, just deeply maintained with a lot of assumptions about what others thought of me and whether such thoughts had the weight to pull the rug out from under me. I remember one tragic time, very early in my time as a pastor. My younger sister was killed in a car accident, and I went into a tailspin of emotional ambiguity trying to figure out how to maintain my "happy-go-lucky" attitude as I internally dealt with the pain of such a loss. Not a healthy way of dealing with a death in the family at all. As a result, I had a whole lot of emotional baggage I took with me to South Africa. Thank God NieuCommunities created the opportunities I needed to address such deep pain.

This may be just a personal observation, and if this doesn't include you, please don't try to fit the problem with your own situation. But if you serve in any kind of church or missions ministry and find yourself attempting to maintain a level of happiness or some other mask in order to ensure others see you in a way you believe they want to see you...don't do it! It's going to come back and beat you up later. I know for myself, I have SO many regrets for not allowing myself to grieve the loss of my sister. Such a mask prevented me from being me, and I'm still dealing with trying to make sense of how to live my life in a real, no mask needed, way of being.

I'll let that sit for now. If you've got thoughts to share, I'd love to hear 'em...and I'm sure other's would, as well.

Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That our new home brings happiness and joy to us and our new neighbors
• That the kids would continue to find joy and peace as the future unfolds with or without us
  
• That we are able to continue to find joy in the moment as we prepare for the future
  
• That our lives would be a blessing to those serve and work with in business and service
  

Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That our move to our new home brings happiness and joy to us and our new neighbors
  
• That we are able to continue to find joy in the moment as we prepare for the future
  
• That our lives would be a blessing to those serve and work with in business and service
  

Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That we are able to help the kids find closure at this point, even if it is not forever
  
• For our friends mourning the loss of their child, and our landlords at the loss of their mother
• That we are able to find suitable housing for ourselves, and the possibility of the kids

Sorry for the late and lame update. It's been a tough week. Friends of ours are mourning the loss of their child. Our landlords are mourning the loss of their mother. And all this has piqued our own emotions as we continue to attempt to make sense of the circumstances we find ourselves.

The passing of our landlord's mother brought the formal request for us to vacate the home we're in so they can sell it. As a result, we're running around like mad trying to find suitable housing. The daunting question at the moment is...do we pursue housing sufficient for ourselves or suitable for the kids, as well?

At the moment we're attempting to keep the opportunity for adoption open, so it makes sense to pursue a townhouse or house with at least three bedrooms and two baths and at least a small yard for the kids. Such a quest brings on the emotions like you wouldn't believe. It's very strange to say no to housing that would work well for us for the sake of a pipe-dream that may not even play itself out for another year or more!

I know these updates are starting to lose their appeal. So, I'm sorry for that. I hope somewhere along the way we'll have highlights worth reading.

In the mean time, please continue to pray for the kids...pray for us...but especially pray for our friends and landlord as they mourn their losses. 

Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That Debbie enjoys her FIRST week at Telephone Service Center
  
• That we're able to continue to prayerfully consider how to move forward with the kids in mind
  
• That Sean continues to gain competence and joy in his position as a Student Mentor
  

Deb's cousin Ann Marie is here from New York and we're showing her EVERYTHING California has to offer...including Spongebob, of course! (Click this pic to see bigger versions!)

Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That Debbie enjoys her last week at her office
  
• That we're able to continue to prayerfully consider how to move forward with the kids in mind
  
• That Sean continues to gain competence and joy in his position as a Student Mentor
  

 
It was one TOUGH week! First getting a bunch of phone calls from our social worker including us in the newest updates regarding the kids and our potential role in what could happen! THEN, attempting to celebrate another holiday without the kids with us...remembering how WONDERFUL our Easter with them was last year! (Here's a few shots from last year...click this pic to see larger versions!)

Prayers Needed....
This week... 

• That Debbie enjoys her last two weeks at her office
  
• That we connect well with our new couple's group
  
• That Sean's training as a Student Mentor would continue to enthuse him in his new job
  
• That this Easter would draw the world to better understanding of God
  

This weekend we had an AWESOME opportunity to celebrate Debbie's 41st birthday in Hollywood where we enjoyed "Wicked - The Musical" and joined in some of the Anti-War Protest Activities...which were interesting to say the least! (Click this pick to see more!)

March 2008

Well, in time, all good things must come to an end it seems. After three and half years of amazing, life-changing experiences in South Africa and one and half years of transitioning into missional living here in the states, we now come to the time where we are ending our missionary journey with CRM/NieuCommunities and stepping back into the business world - integrating our missional training with the every day life of full time business work, while serving our family, friends, neighbors, community, and ministries throughout the week in alternative ways.

It is with great sadness that we are sending this update out as we reflect on all our opportunities we have had to learn, grow, and serve with CRM/NieuCommunities.  We’ve had an incredible journey with all of you – through prayer and financial partnership –while traveling through the ups and downs of missionary work, as well as foster parenting.  Having you along on this crazy ride was the only reason we could do what we did. We thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all the prayers, the emails of encouragement and the financial support over the years.

Since both Sean and I are working full time now in the business world, we can no longer receive the financial support through CRM.  So at this time, we will need to ask you not to send any more financial donations to CRM on our behalf. However, for those of you who still desire to financially support the kind of missionary endeavors we were involved, we would love to encourage you in redirecting your financial support to any one of the team members in NieuCommunities South Africa, Vancouver or the soon-to-be site in San Diego.  The teams are made up of wonderful, committed, faithful people who could certainly use the additional support! Take a look at www.crmleaders.org for more information.

We will still be maintaining the FraserWorld website since Sean will continue serving his patients as a hospice chaplain and pursuing opportunities to serve the homeless community at the Long Beach Rescue Mission, and I am still serving in kid's ministry at Terra Nova Church and look forward to getting more involved with a group of likeminded believers again.

With the kids gone, us working full time in the business world and leaving CRM, we are entering into another transitional time….and could really use your prayers.  This will be a hard transition to make - a very emotional one for us.  

Thank you, again, for your love and support and we look forward to still sharing life with you in the many years to come!